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post #1 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 10:52 PM Thread Starter
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The Drunktionary

Ah drunk people...will they ever say what they mean? Below youíll find some common drunk phrases and what they translate to in sober language. I hope this helps you gauge whether or not itís a good idea to let your buddy in the car when he claims heís ďtotally fine, dude.Ē

(Drunk Term = Sober Translation)


I LOVE This Song! = I KNOW This Song!

Dude, all the chicks at this party are ugly = Dude, none of the chicks at this party will talk to me.

Man, Iím hungry = Man, if I donít eat right now I am going to be puking all over this barÖagain.

Youíre really pretty = Iím going to be ashamed of it tomorrow but tonight is all about instant gratification, honey.

Want to watch a movie? = Want to come over to my room for some extremely creepy back rubbing and some equally disturbing neck-nibbling?

Iím soooo drunk = Iím planting a seed in your head that will eventually grow into a beautiful tree which excuses me from blame for my actions tonight.

I just, like, want to help animals, ya know? = I just, like, want to get in your pants, ya know?

Youíre my best friend, man = Youíre my only friend in armís reach right now and I need someone to pay for this shot, man.

I donít want to ruin the friendship = Youíre a nice girl but youíre very heavy and Iíd rather pretend I value our friendship than spend tomorrow dreaming up ways to kill myself.

This is the BEST night of my LIFE! = This is the BEST night of my WEEKEND!

Letís take a walk, this bar is crowded = I prefer my handjobs outdoors.

Iím totally fine, dude = Iím totally going to be needing a toilet or bucket in about five minutes, dude.

Whatís up, Bro? = Whatís up, guy-whoís-name-I-canít-ever-remember?

Who wants to dance? = Who wants to watch me stumble around the party, waving my arms, spilling my drink and pile-driving my genitals into anything wearing a skirt?

Hey, did you get the notes from Bio? = Hey, Iím going to ask you about class because Iím too scared to ask you out.

I had, like, ten beers before I even came out = I'm, like, the kind of guy that lies about how much I drink.

Dude, I didnít even make it out of the dorms last night! = Dude, my girlfriend made me stay in and watch the Gilmore Girls season 1 DVD with her last night!

Now, seriously, who wants to watch a movie?





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"I don't like your jerk off name, I don't like your jerk off face, I don't like your jerk off behavior, and I don't like you...... jerk off!"
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post #2 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:06 PM
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hahahahahaha
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post #3 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:18 PM
 
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Actually... I thought sober people use some of those terms on the left too... :laugh



: :laugh
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post #4 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:43 PM
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hey, vale, let's take a walk, this thread is crowded

prejudices are what fools use for reason
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post #5 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:45 PM
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ghEy.. get a room. :1poke :ghey
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post #6 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:48 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord_Phat
hey, vale, let's take a walk, this thread is crowded
hey, Lord_Phat, I donít want to ruin the friendship...
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post #7 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:51 PM
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but vale, i think you're really pretty

prejudices are what fools use for reason
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post #8 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-02-2005, 11:56 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord_Phat
but vale, i think you're really pretty
but LP, I think I'm totally fine...
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post #9 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 12:43 AM
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i just wanna help the animals, ya know?

prejudices are what fools use for reason
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post #10 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 12:53 AM
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lol
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post #11 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 09:31 AM
 
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whats up bros!?
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post #12 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 09:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DeFlankoDesigns
whats up bros!?
:imwst EACH OTHER
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post #13 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 11:18 AM
 
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Lets make a :ghey Sectioon for Val and LP
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post #14 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 11:29 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve04R1
Lets make a :ghey Sectioon for Val and LP
:imwst

Don't forget MV
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post #15 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 11:32 AM
 
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nah Pvt he is the only one I can confirm isn't gay.... I met him his lovely wife and kids...
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post #16 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 11:41 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Steve04R1
nah Pvt he is the only one I can confirm isn't gay.... I met him his lovely wife and kids...
Ah that's a cover up!!! The truth is out there.. :laugh
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post #17 of 17 (permalink) Old 10-03-2005, 11:45 AM
 
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