A collection of insults
Yours was an unnatural birth; you came from a human being.
You have nothing to fear from my base instincts; it's my finer ones that tell me to kill you.
It's your life but I wish you'd let us have it.
Hey, act your age senile!
Don't you realize that there are enough people to hate in the world already without your working so hard to give us another?
The thing that terrifies me the most is that someone might hate me as much as I loathe you.
When you get run over by a car, it shouldn't be listed under accidents.
I've had many cases of love that were just infatuation, but this hate I feel for you is the real thing.
You're the best at all you do and all you do is make people hate you.
In the dictionary under the word, stupid, it says, see him.
We know you could not live without us. We'll pay for the funeral.
We do not complain about your shortcomings, but about your long sayings.
We hear you are a lady-killer. They take one look at you and die of fright!
We heard that when you ran away from home your folks sent you a note saying, "Do not come home and all will be forgiven".
Is your name Amazon? You're so wide at the mouth.
You are a man who always sticks by his convictions. You will remain a fool no matter how much you get ridiculed for it!
You have a good family tree, but the crop is a failure.
I don't consider you a vulture. I consider you something a vulture would eat.
A dope you are and dope will remain.
Completely unlike cocaine.
You add to, not diminish, pain!
We know that you would go to the end of the world for us. But would you stay there?
Your family tree is good, but you are the sap.
We all spring from apes, but you didn't spring far enough.
It cost me five thousand dollars to look up your family history. A thousand to look it up and four thousand to hush it up.
Lets play house. You'll be the door and I'll slam you.
Even your best friend cheats on you and lies to you, and that's the best friend you can get.
I don't think you are a fool. But then, what's my own humble opinion against thousands of others?
Nobody says that you are dumb. They just say you were sixteen years old before you learned how to wave goodbye.
People say that you are the perfect idiot. I say that you are not perfect, but you are doing all right.
I hear you are a real humanitarian. You have kept three or four detectives working regularly.
I hear you are connected to the Police Department by a pair of handcuffs.
Hello tall, dark and obnoxious!
You remind me of the ocean you make me sick.
You should have been born in the Dark Ages; you look terrible in the light.
All of your ancestors must number in the millions; it's hard to believe that many people are to blame for producing you.
You are so two-faced that any woman who married you would be married to a bigamist.
I always wanted to be a trouble-shooter, but now I see you are not worth it!
Ordinarily people live and learn. You just live.
The mind reader had a very busy day today reading minds. You were a vacation for him.
I thought of you all day today when I was at the zoo.
Ever since I saw you in your family tree, I've wanted to cut it down.
I hear that when you were a child your mother wanted to hire someone to take care of you, but the Mafia wanted too much.
They just invented a new coffin just for you that goes over the head. It's for people who are dead from the neck up.
After hearing you talk, I now know that the dead do contact us.
When you talk, other people get hoarse just listening.
I would say that you are barking up the wrong tree, but that is your natural voice.
I reprimanded my brother for mimicking you. I told him not to act like a fool.
I'm very careful of how I express my opinions of you because I want to put as much vituperation in them as possible.
I don't hold your behaviour against you because I realize it was caused by childhood trauma; your parents spanked you when you fell on your head and broke the cement.