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post #1 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 02:17 AM Thread Starter
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Smile When girls don't put out.....

:r1budha :r1budha :r1budha :r1budha


WHEN GIRLS DON'T PUT OUT

This was written by a guy... it's pretty damn smart. Girls -- Have a sense of humor!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said , "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least she knows I'm smarter than her.


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ONCE YOU'VE HAD ASIAN, YOU WILL NEVER TOUCH CAUCASIAN
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OLD AGE AND TREACHERY WILL ALWAYS OVERCOME YOUTH AND ENTHUSIASM
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post #2 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 02:19 AM Thread Starter
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Spotted a nice looking woman at a party, and went over and started a conversation by asking her name.She replied "It's Carmen". I commented that it was nice name and asked if she was named after anyone,She said no, she had given it to herself to reflect the things she liked most : cars and men.

She then asked me my name. "Beertits Hunt" ,I replied.


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ONCE YOU'VE HAD ASIAN, YOU WILL NEVER TOUCH CAUCASIAN
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post #3 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 05:11 AM
 
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Serves her right, the whole "punishing" concept is stupid and really doesn't do much good at all, other than build recentment.
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post #4 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 05:16 AM
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Sorry Warp but this is :r1budha :r1budha :r1budha and a repost
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post #5 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 06:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MV-999R View Post
Sorry Warp but this is :r1budha :r1budha :r1budha and a repost
:imwst but still


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post #6 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 08:45 AM Thread Starter
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Good to see you boys are on the ball, luckily I put up the old farts smilies to give you lot a hint


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post #7 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 09:50 AM
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I thought that was a reference to you.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Warp Racer View Post
Good to see you boys are on the ball, luckily I put up the old farts smilies to give you lot a hint



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post #8 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 11:37 AM
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awesome


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post #9 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 11:55 AM
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Knowledge will cure ignorance, but you can't fix stupid
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post #10 of 10 (permalink) Old 10-03-2006, 10:36 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Biga View Post
I thought that was a reference to you.





Both


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