Anything Goes Self explanatory forum name... (No NWS)

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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-27-2008, 04:23 PM Thread Starter
Master of Sergeants
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Crazy sightings??


This should brighten your day, there is always some one who makes us look
intelligent. :-)

> We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us
> that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough
> motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the
> largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his
> head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that
> 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than
> two.."
> We haven't used Sears repair since.
> My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I
> gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a
> She said, "you gave me too much money." I said, "Yes I know, but this
> way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to
> get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he
> handed me back the quarter, and said "We're sorry but they could not
> do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1
> and 75 cents in change.
> Do not confuse the clerks at Mc D's.
> I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the
> local township administrative office to request the removal of the
> DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being
> hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to
> be crossing anymore."
> From Kingman , KS .
> My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked
> the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was
> sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.
> From Kansas City
> I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport
> employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your
> To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?"
> He
> smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
> Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
> The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the
> street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of
> mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that
> it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she
> responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving?!"
> She was a probation officer in Wichita , KS
> At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker. She was leaving
> the company due to "downsizing." Our manager commented cheerfully,
> "This is fun. We should do this more often." Not another word was
> spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights
> This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
> I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into
> itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her
> system would not turn on.
> A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.
> When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up
> our car, w e were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the
> service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock
> the drivers side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I
> instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was
> unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "its open!" His
> reply, "I know. I already got that side."
> This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , Mississi

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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-27-2008, 05:43 PM
Rollin in my 5.0
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Too bad its illigal to shoot stupid people LOL :gun

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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-27-2008, 06:09 PM
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-27-2008, 06:34 PM
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hahaha nice
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-27-2008, 06:51 PM
I dont inhale
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they are funny as hell, I will have to start writing down some of mine

I work at a hospital we had a patient named Annie Orifice. I though it was funny as hell. I told a coworker I wanted to page her overhead to endoscopy( where they do colonoscopies and such) she totally did not get it.

Watching tv with a friend, she said the program was live. I said no its not. She said well they taped it live. I could not even argue with that.

i used to work at a place where we made circuit boards. The ship the chips in long tubes with plastic spring looking things in the ends to keep them from getting damaged. When I would remove the chips from the plastic tubes I would put all the spring looking things in a bin. A coworker came in and asked what are those. I told her they were the springs for the Donkey Kong game. It took a couple minutes of convincing (they did really look like them) but in the end she went home and told her boy friend we made donkey kong games ( which we didnt) and she saw the springs before they were in the game. She did not talk to me for like a week. lol, im still giggling about this one as i type it

just for fun when i was in my early twenties I used to throw an extra penny or nickle in with my money just to mess with the stupid people behind the counter. The extra coin I would throw in would not make even change or anything it was just extra money. some of them would stare at the coin for quite some time. The smart ones would just give the coin back.

last one

like i said i work in a hospital. Im at a nurses station and I hear a nurse at the end of the unit start screaming help oh my god help me. I run down there she is holding a patients GLASS eye in her hand. She was washing her face and the glass eye popped out and she though it was her real eye. I laughed so hard my sides hurt. After she figuired it out the girl sat down on the floor and half cried half laughed. She is no longer a nurse. But me and the other nurse that was in the unit still laugh about it every once in a while.

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