Tom had been in the liquor business for 25 years. Finally sick of the
stress he quits his job and buys 50 acres of land in Alaska as far from
humanity as possible. He sees the postman once a week and gets groceries
once a month.
Otherwise it's total peace and quiet.
After six months or so of almost total isolation, someone knocks on his
door. He opens it and a huge, bearded man standing there.
'Name's Lars, your neighbour from forty miles up the road. Having a
Christmas party Friday night... Thought you might like to come. About
'Great', says Tom, 'after six months out here I'm ready to meet some
local folks. Thank you.'
As Lars is leaving, he stops. 'Gotta warn you......be some drinkin'.'
'Not a problem' says Tom. 'After 25 years in the business, I can drink
with the best of 'em.'
Again, the big man starts to leave and stops. 'More 'n' likely gonna be
some fightin' too.'
'Well, I get along with people, I'll be all right. I'll be there, Thanks
'More'n likely be some wild sex, too.'
'Now that's really not a problem' says Tom, warming to the idea. 'I've
been all alone for six months! I'll definitely be there. By the way,
what should I wear?'
'Don't much matter..... Just gonna be the two of us.'